Beauty!

I have seen beauty!

And she beckons!

She calls to the deepest parts of me

And strikes a note surpassing the grasp of hasty emotions

Resounding on the paves of my mind

And quenching seeming doubts of her existence

With strides more confident than I could ever anticipate

Inspiring uncommon passions in me
I'm persuaded to worship her Creator

As she subliminally assures me every fleshy inclination will fail

I simply admire
With all self-restraint I can afford

Earnestly praying
She shall someday look my direction and smile.

Oh! I have seen beauty

And she has captivated me

I live, I Thank You

I live
I learn
I grow
I look back
I smile

I reminisce the days
I remember my ways
I regret my stupidity
I admit my mistakes
I laugh at my 'jonesing'

I probe my strategies
I acknowledge the challenges
I review the processes
I assess the outcomes
I appreciate the experiences -

I probed love;
I discovered man can't
I questioned friendship;
I caught the trick

I sought God;
I found satisfaction
I kept seeking;
I saw more -

I look down
I realize
I am higher
I look up
I thank You!

My World (Sometimes..)

Sometimes my mind ticks and my time thinks
Sometimes my birds dance and my trees sing
Sometimes my moon and sun swap places
Sometimes I look at you and see many faces
Sometimes it's too complex for more than one mind to understand
Sometimes it really doesn't make much sense

But it's a very beautiful world I've got
Up here in my head.

OK...I am jonesing again!

I can’t sing you that song I wrote you ‘cos I’m still not sure I’ve got the right lyrics, tune and voice for it
I can’t say “I love you” cos its now cliché and...
I can’t say I know you very well; which should actually come first.
I can’t be too caring and nice cos I can’t risk being misinterpreted for an unveiling disguise.
I can’t see through your eyes but I’ld love to know how I appear to you; but I can’t.
I can’t be too direct with my words cos this way I hide my cowardice, get stuff off my chest and get compliment for poetry at the same time. Ha ha…
Yeah, I can’t help staring at you when you’re excited and making those bold expressions on your face
I can’t deny that you’re really (really) beautiful…and your smile is just so charming and adorable
And I can’t pretend not to know how desired you are by many and how blessed ‘the one’ would be and feel to have you.
And forgive me…I can’t stop finding you amazing, cos you really are; you’ve got that rare ‘something’!

But hey, I’m not such a loser…there are certain things I can do;
I can keep simple promises like “I’ll buy you lunch” and “I’ll pray for you”
I can understand if, somehow, we never go dancing, for whatever reasons…it’s ok, we could just spend time talking ‘real’ stuff, picking on each other and playing
And yes, very importantly …I can say “I will kill you” in your own dialect (& I hope you’re totally scared now)
I can tell you the scarce truth when you need to hear it…yeah, I can be unnecessarily helpful sometimes
I can keep secrets.
I can keep you company while on our way on a short journey
I can guess you will never read this if I don’t show you but that’s ok….cos
I can live with you not knowing these

Please don’t mind how I just put words and ideas together and make a post, “that’s just how I roll”. This time I just felt like doing it this way and hey, I still think you are amazing! And I hope this sincere note makes you smile (at least for a second).

GT

Thank You!

You taught me silence by letting me say it all
And taught me calmness by letting me do it all.
Now before another word I must weigh it all.
And before another move I'll replay it all.

You helped me to learn things I couldn't be taught
And led me to win fights I couldn't have fought.
So now I smile when I reminisce the hurt
'Cos now I see You were more to me than I had ever thought.

Thank You

You Are

You are the air i breathe
I cant grasp what i feel
But i feel you
Somewhere in between my lungs' walls
I breathe you
Out in my songs
Not long, I long
To be filled again.
And again and again
I can't grasp what i feel but
I need you
Everywhere. Like the air

You are poetry
Too deep for the shallow to swallow
Too big for canal wisdom to narrow
Your existence and essence
Science cant sense.
Yet my soul connects with your presence
And my spirit resonates with your expression;
Word by word
Lord

You are time
Ageless
Never ceasing to rhyme
Like the tick of a second
You reappear too often to deny
You are there, near
Still
Moving
Unstoppably

You are light
so bright
Fools can't see

You are who you are;

Great.
The creator of existence
And the spirit that hovered before it.
Bright morning star
The Son and father,
The One
Immortal infinite One!

That's who you are

You are nothing!
Nothing my words can fully describe
because you are indescribable

That's what you are

The Rain

I was inspired to write this song as an expression of the joy experienced when 'returning home' after wandering away or momentarily getting distracted from one's intimacy with the Father (God). In this lyrics, "rain" is used figuratively to refer to Gods' mercy that makes us clean again and takes us in. Hope you are inspired by it. Please drop a comment (suggestion or anything you want to say) after listening. Thanks!

Verses:
I never knew that I could stray
so far away from your embrace
I turned my back and walked away
forsook your mercy, love and grace

but never found love like You showed me
I broke your heart O' Lord I'm sorry
been with the crowd and been alone
Lord I just wan' come back home

The sky is changing, clouds are forming
your open arms are waiting for me
I feel the wind of hope and drops of mercy
I'm happy as can be
'Cos...(chorus)

Chorus:
I see the rain coming
the rain falling on me
it's gonna wipe away the stain
it's gonna wash away the shame
from me
the rain falling on me
it's gonna take away the pain
make me pure and whole again

Special thanks to Oluchukwu Chiazor (Oluchi) for doing the vocals

Still Standing

[Prelude] While some may still be counting in days, for me and many others here, it’s been three years. Thank you Lord!

A journey begun with a journey
Call it an experience, call it a story
Make it sound serious or funny
But surely
not as smooth a ride as ignorance may suggest
Men have risen and some have fallen.
Men have been made and some broken
Some bent, some straightened
Things have happened;
The good, the bad, the secret and unspoken.
But thankfully, Lord,
thankfully, I'm still standing.

Here, on grace, Lord
I’m standing, humbly,
giving you praise
Reminiscing the blue and white
that clad my naive beginning
The mixed feelings;
uncertainty how the days would pan
and how the moments will go.
All we could then do was trust.
And yes, Lord, I did.
And When time, time slowly unveiled
loneliness, scarcity of love,
scorching heat of academic demands
dressed with freezing-cold classes
And freedom;
freedom to kill my own dreams.
But you Baba, You kept me.
And I’m still standing

There were some good times, though;
Good grades, good pals,
good events and achievements.
But how would I ever forget.
How would I forget that there were times
when grades fell and reseat exam threatened faiths.
How could I forget that there were times
when hospital and hospital beds were necessity for some.
How could I forget those silent, lonely moments of depression
and the bumpiness of those emotional roller coasters.
And Lord, how,
how could we ever thank you enough
that through all these we have reason to each say
“I’m still standing”

[Note] I wrote this to as a recitation (with background instrumental: "Grace" by Michael W. Smith) at ASF (African Students’ Fellowship) UNMC third annual thanksgiving held on 29^th May, 2009.

Favourite Songs

Carried to The Table
Artist: Leeland
Album: Sound of Melodies
Video:

Why?
This song humbles me with deep realization of God's love and favour to an unworthy me.


Let It Out (Shout)
Artist: Kirk Franklin
Album: Imagine Me
Video:

Why?
Being real (I mean, really real) to people (even those very close) about sensitive past experiences or personal struggles are most times as hard as the struggles themselves. While some people believe it is safer to 'lock them up' somewhere inside and pretend they don't exist, I realize doing that neither makes you better than who you really are nor helps you fight them. Letting it out is hard but necessary, for us and others.

Meaningless
Artist: Anthony Evans
Album: Letting Go
Video:

Why?
Life is filled with so much 'music' and 'noise' that it becomes very easy to be tuned to the rhythm of worldly pursuit. Living for God is more than just having Him in the picture; it is making him the centre and realizing everything else is meaningless in itself. Yes! degree, material possession, life...everything is "meaningless without you", Lord!

Desert Song
Artist: Hillsong
Album: This Is Our God
Video:

Why?
I must admit, what first attracted me to this song was its groovy instrumental...really nice, always makes me want to dance. But, listening to it more meaningfully i was reminded of my 'downtimes' when things couldn't have been any worse; depression and many unanswered questions. In such seasons it takes a lot more than just being a good Christian to sincerely praise God. Listening to this song, I pray that I may never be too overwhelmed to remember "all of my life, in every season, you are my God, I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship".

Words

I believe in words
I believe in the power of words
I believe they bear power
to create and destroy
to kill and bring to life
to hurt and heal

So I'm sensitive to words
I'm sensitive to their dips and tones
that they hold no meaning of their own;
helpless captives of expression
messengers of thought
and mirrors of mind
whose image though veiled by skill
never stands alone

So now I pledge to words
To seek those that hold truth
To quote those that hold value
keep those that inspire
and speak those that edify
Despite how hard
I'm not afraid to pledge
to try
'Cos I believe in the power of words

Petal-less rose

I cry for you O beautiful one.
I cant seem to stop the tears from forming
and eventually rolling off my eyes each time i think of you.
You had beauty that tingled men's imaginations
and aroused dreams in many.
fragrace that earned secret praises and respect
from all who had a taste for purity.
you had that scent.
even before you sprouted into the view of anxious eyes
and grasp of filthy fingers.
But then, unlike now,
they couldnt see it.
their eyes were too big to.
And you,
your eyes were too small to.


i feel for you, beautiful one!
Really.
Is this what is left of you?
Dust patterns as camouflage for your lost charm;
dancing aimlessly to the rhythm of false winds of excitement;
a bid to escape the sight of the truth that now hunts you.
tell me.
I want to know.
Is this you? now petalless.
is this you
who will someday be presented to another on the isle of sincerity?


I want to hear from you, beautiful one.
What is left of you now?
What is left to have or to hold?
what love shall you claim for the one whose treasure you willfully gave to another;
and whose package you've unsealed
and selfishly traded for your own pleasure.
do you not feel any guilt?
do you not feel any shame?
or do you just not care?


I'll pray for you beautiful one.
that you do not plant yourself in the shady hedge
where darkness shall daily clothe you.
where the stregth of your stalk shall daily dwindle
and ugly hands joyfully take a share of your remnant.

But I still love you, beautiful one.
and though you've lost the beauty i once saw
i'll still call you "beautiful"
beacuse the creator hasnt called you less.